The Scene recently posted a video of two ex’s confronting each other regarding infidelity that has now gone viral. After watching, women on twitter were sent into a frenzy with the consensus being, that guy is the scum of the earth. The comments range from: “hard to watch,” “he felt no remorse,” “there’s no way he really cared for her,” to “women are trash at picking men,” “I felt for her,” and “it couldn’t have been me.” #HurtBae has now turned into an internet sensation so I figured I’d give my two cents on the dramatization.

The video begins with Hurt Bae asking her ex to tell her exactly what he did. He answers, “I had sex with other girls. I did everything,” and the way he’s smirking and not able to keep a straight face let me know everything I needed to about the situation within the first 13 seconds. He doesn’t care about her or the situation at all and he never took the woman seriously. I don’t know why she didn’t dead the conversation right then and there.

They recap meeting in college and becoming the best of friends! Then things quickly got dark. She reveals she caught him sexting other women multiple times and when he didn’t stop, she stayed. Next she caught him with another girl in his room and he brazenly kicked her out. She believed him when he said he wouldn’t do it again, again and stayed in the relationship despite not being able to trust him. So of course she spent the rest of their time together going through his phone to turn the relationship into more of a mother, son dynamic. This is when he asks her the million-dollar question, “if you would go through such measures to find out whatever, why wouldn’t you just leave?” Ding, ding, ding! Women who spend their free time going through their bfs phones, stalking social media and combing through emails just to cry and stay please stop it. What are you getting out of this? Where are you finding the time? Please put your energy into something constructive because I can’t think of a faster way to drive dick away than trying to cage and regulate it. Find you a man that actually wants to commit, leave or simply be quiet.

This is a classic example of, he’s just not that into you. Women need to be able to recognize these red flags way sooner. He can claim he loves you and is willing to commit till he’s blue in the face but if his actions are showing you the opposite then you need to listen to that. Actions speak louder than words, it really is just that simple. If he wanted to stop texting bitches he would. If he wanted to stop fucking bitches he would! He doesn’t want to and he showed her that in every way possible but she still sat there hoping he would change while giving him even more of a reason not to. When someone shows you who they really are believe them.

Ladies, no man that loves you or considers you to be a soulmate, lover and best friend will ever in his life look you in your eyes and laugh at your pain talking about, ‘I lost track of how many times I cheated.’ Man please! Have enough love for yourselves to walk away from situations that are no longer serving you. Reciprocity is the most integral part in regards to love. If your partner cannot match your commitment, your love, your ambition, your quality of life well then baby you got to go. Stop lying next to men who don’t even respect you.

Yall don’t really hear me though. Just go ahead and keep checking your man’s phone, let me know how much joy and happiness it brings!

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